Kurt Russell is no stranger to science fiction, long before taking the role of Peter Quill’s father in
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 he’d appeared in such sci-fi offerings as
Solider,
Stargate and John Carpenter’s
The Thing but his first foray into the genre was way back 1966 as a guest star in the Irwin Allen television show
Lost in Space. The episode was called "
The Challenge" and featured young Kurt Russell as the warrior Quano who decided to test his medal against Will Robinson.
The episode opens with Will Robinson (
Billy Mumy) and Doctor Smith (
Jonathan Harris)
sleeping outside the Jupiter 2 in the hopes that their elaborate alarm
system would entrap a mysterious invader who lurked somewhere in the
shadows. This is one of those weird character inconsistencies when it
comes to the cowardly Doctor Smith as we get no reason as to why he’d
agree to rough it outside their perfectly safe spaceship when there is a
possibly dangerous intruder about, but even stranger is that the
Jupiter 2 had already been established as having force fields so such an
alarm systems doesn’t seem to be all that needed in the first place.
Regardless of its necessity it does alert Will, who has to kick Doctor
Smith to wake up, that there is in fact an intruder about.
“Danger Will Robinson its Kurt Russell.”
After
this “menacing” intruder tosses as spear at Will and Doctor Smith,
which of course misses wildly, he is introduced as Quano (
Kurt Russell) and soon the whole Robinson family has to deal with this rather obnoxious visitor.
“I am called Quano, I am twelve years old, I am very brave and strong, would you like to fight and see who is the better man?”
This challenge was addressed to Will and is basicly crux to this
episode's plot; Quano is from an alien world ruled by a warrior class
with strength and courage being weighed above all else, and at a certain
age a young warrior must seek out an opponent to prove he is the best.
I’m not sure what kind of warrior race would consider beating up little
Billy Mumy as worthy proof of badassery but who am I to judge alien
cultures.
Note:
At the time of shooting of this episode Billy Mummy had just turned
twelve and Kurt Russell was actually turning fifteen in a couple of
weeks. So yeah, totally fair fight.
It’s also made clear that Quano is from a rather sexist planet as when Penny Robinson (
Angela Cartwright) questions him he responds,
“I do not speak to weak and worthless girls.”
This series is a major product of the 60s so the battle of the sexes
was bound to make an appearance it’s just unfortunate that the script
doesn’t have the women doing anything other than poor coffee, make
breakfast and worrying about the menfolk. Wouldn’t it have been cool if
Penny was the one to end up defeating Quano?
“Honey, I know you could totally kick his ass.”
When
Will announces he is off to hunt rocks Quano offers to join him on the
hunt, totally dissing Penny and refusing her wish to accompany them, but
the little alien shit isn’t really interested in rock collecting and he
tells Will that he is on this planet to be tested by his father, to
prove he is worthy of becoming the ruler someday. When Will doesn’t
seem interested in entering a strange cave to do battle with an unknown
enemy Quano calls him out, “
I suspected from the first that you were a coward.”
This of course results in the easily goaded Will into agreeing to go
with him and the two head into the cave where they soon encounter a
horrific creature from the studios used prop department.
The Fly meets the Creeping Terror.
Courage
and stupidity go and in hand and Quano soon trips over a rock and
knocks himself unconscious, Will valiantly stays by his fallen
“friend's” side and the pair only survive because Quano’s father The
Ruler (
Michael Ansara)
arrives and chases the creature off with a couple of shots from his
blaster. The Ruler berates his son for doing something so foolish and
praises Will for his bravery, and thus the tension mounts between the
two kids and Quano eventually offers his “Challenge” to Will. At first
John Robinson (
Guy Williams) refuses to have his son compete in some kind of intergalactic pissing contest,
“Will doesn’t have to prove himself to anyone,”
but when Quano then calls Will’s dad a coward the kid jumps the alien
boy and takes him down (despite Kurt Russell considerably outweighing
Billy Mumy).
“And don’t forget to grab his lunch money, son.”
Maureen Robinson (
June Lockhart)
demands that her husband call off the fight but John refuses as this
would hurt their sons pride as it would imply that he doesn’t have faith
in him, stating that
“I don’t care how primitive or civilized a man
is he welcomes a challenge, why it’s part of his nature to test his
intelligence as well as his strength. Without these things we’d be
living in caves and eating out of stone bowls.” This stirring
argument clearly trumps a mother's concern for her son and she agrees to
let Will fight, but there is more at stake than just Will’s pride which
we learn when Doctor Smith and the Robot (
Bob May)
overhear Quano and his father talking and discover that if Quano loses
the two of them must kill the victor and all witnesses,
“It is our law, no one must be superior to you.”
In this conversation it’s also implied that Quano has lost on other
planets and that The Ruler has had to dispatch people in the past, and
kind of making thing Quano must kind of suck at the whole "Challenge
"thing, but regardless this clearly upsets Doctor Smith who goes into
immediate self-preservation mode.
“Nice ray gun you’ve got there, did you get it on sale?”
The Ruler catches Doctor Smith eavesdropping and he is warned,
“Whatever you heard you will keep your silence. If you tell the others anything you will be destroyed.”
Smith than proceeds to do his best to ensure that Will doesn’t win the
contest, but what is interesting here is that Smith is completely in the
right in this instance. There is no benefit other than to Will’s ego
for the young Robinson to win and if Quano loses they all die, but of
course the show highlights Smiths cowardly and duplicitous nature and
that he is more concerned with himself dying than he is the others. So
Doctor Smith tries to exercise Will to the point of exhaustion, and
later even goes to Quano to offer his services in swaying the fight his
way, but has no luck on either count. Thing is Quano maybe a sexist
little jerk with the ego the size of a planet but he has honor and
basically tells Smith to take a hike before he kills him.
People tend to threaten Doctor Smith a lot on this show.
The
contest goes fairly well with Will losing the first event, which was a
test of physical strength and which again I'll point out it was to a guy
clearly larger by a fair margin, and then they proceed to go through a
battery of pretty non-life threatening events; a test of courage that
has you wear a virtual reality type headset to face your greatest fear,
they crush porous stones in their hands, and have cool laser target
practice. During a break, and while the score is tied with only one
event left, Smith tries to convince Will to throw the fight,
“You’ve
already covered yourself with glory Will, there’s nothing further to be
proved in defeating Quano, if on the other hand he should win we could
talk his father into taking us back to Earth.” Will doesn’t see it that way and states,
“I’m
not just trying to beat Quano for myself, it’s like I was representing
every boy from Earth against every boy from another planet.” The
problem with that reasoning is that not a single boy on Earth or from
any other planet is going to know about this fight. It’s not like this
event was broadcasting live across the universe. So it's really Will's
pride that keeps them stuck on this particular planet.
Way to go you selfish little twerp.
All
of Smith’s attempted machinations are for naught as The Ruler pulls his
son out of the match in fear that his son will lose and he can't risk
Quano having another defeat (So what was with all that
"We will have to kill the victor and witnesses"
thing he was talking about earlier?), but the match isn’t over as The
Ruler will substitute for his son and John Robinson will stand in for
his. The final contest is a duel with Volta blades that are basically
fencing foils that are attached to cables that channel roughly 50,000
volts through them. It’s a pretty spirited duel with Robinson does cut a
tree in half with a swing, and despite The Ruler being some
intergalactic warrior badass John disarms him and the contest comes to
an end.
Apparently no one told The Ruler that Guy Williams also played Zorro.
The
Ruler congratulates Robinson on his win but soon notices that his son
has taken one of the spears and has run off. They quickly deduce that
Quano has headed back to the cave to win back his father’s respect by
defeating the monster they encountered earlier. They arrive just as the
kid enters the cave and The Ruler runs to his son and informs him,
“I
was afraid you would be beaten, it was I who lacked courage, there is
no disgrace in defeat, a man does the best he can, nothing more can be
asked of him.” So the leader of an entire planet of warriors just
tossed aside their people’s entire philosophy because he didn’t have
faith in his son? Well I guess their planet still has sexism to fall
back on. The plot wraps up with Quano turning to his father and asking,
“Shall we fight the monster together, father?”
The episode ends with a nice father/son bonding moment.
The Robinson family quietly back out of cave to let the two have their moment together and the whole
“Murder the witnesses and the victor”
spiel is forgotten as The Ruler has learned the true meaning of
courage. But wait a minute, wasn’t there a whole bit about Doctor Smith
hoping this space faring planetary leader could take them home? You’d
think after repairing the relationship between The Ruler and his son the
least the two sexists pigs could do would be to give the Robinsons a
ride home, but that was not to be as with any ongoing series each
episode kind of had to reset back to the status quo each and every week.
“Relax, we’re not making art here.”
This
was a fun episode in what was a fairly engaging and entertaining series
but of course the real treat here is in seeing a young Kurt Russell as
Quano, and sure the monsters are goofy and the sets often look
threadbare at times but that also seems to be part of the charm that
makes this show so watchable.
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